Beki Grinter

Good Beer and Strange Plumbing

In DRAFT on June 30, 2011 at 3:32 pm

I’m packing in preparation for travel to England tomorrow. Clearly the beer is obvious. It requires no explanation to defend the virtues of a real pint.But strange plumbing might.It’s my experience that every single shower in the United Kindgom has a unique mode of operation. Quite frequently this involves enough knobs and dials that one is unclear whether one is attempting to shower or actually participating in the next launch of some rocket. My least favourite of all the settings is the one that the nanny state has provided to tell you how hot it’s going to be… although sometimes after 15-20 minutes of fiddling around with it, you can sometimes get it hotter. And this is important because that is the route to getting a hot shower. The nanny state prefers tepid. I just don’t want the Government in my shower (does that make me a libertarian?).

Which is not a problem in my parent’s “guest shower” which maybe the pinnacle of eccentricity. The “guest shower” is approximately 1 square foot. You think I joke, but it is quite hard to move your arms in such a way that you can rub in shampoo. Another “feature” of this shower is that the hot water appears to be hooked up to a boiler in Eaton (the next village on from Cringleford). You turn the shower on, and then wait, and wait, and wait. I know a thousand environmentalists are weeping as they read this. Fortunately it is the guest shower so it’s not used too often, and my parents are trying to redeem themselves by disconnecting their exterior gutters from the drains and diverting all the water that comes in into a large barrel (thank you local brewery). So if you wondered, no we’re not brewing at my house, we’re just watering the lawn.

So after some time you get hot water (their defence for this is that life is slower in Norfolk and good things are worth waiting for). And it is hot. So you attempt to mix the controls to bring in some cold water. They were set very approximately and apparently like to move around during the course of the shower. So after waiting it is an incentive to get done in less than 2 minutes in which you will have experienced hot, cold, and everything else in between.

I think this shower may win an award for its eccentricity. But despite that, I’m so excited to go, looking forward to seeing them, sampling life in Norfolk which is a bootiful county… I guess I am a Norfolk lass.

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